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Head & Heart #39: Muddy water

July 28, 2019 By Clare Leave a Comment

Photo by Greg Nerantzakis on Unsplash

A quote I’m pondering…

“Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone” ~ Alan Watts.*

Since making running a regular part of my routine I’ve noticed my mental health has been pretty good and I haven’t felt as strong a need for regular meditation in my life. But while the running helps with my mood it doesn’t quite deal with the mental clutter and distraction and reactiveness in the same way that meditation does. This quote has got me thinking about the importance of quiet and stillness, and it also reminded me of something Julia Baird wrote in a New York Times opinion piece about her cancer diagnosis…. ‘stillness and faith can give you extraordinary strength. Commotion drains.’

Our modern lives are full of commotion and chaos and muddy water. Perhaps our way through that to improved wellbeing is not found in personal productivity hacks or new technology or to-do lists or outsourcing, but in more silence and stillness.

* I read the above quote in a recent installment of Ann Friedman’s weekly newsletter which I’d highly recommend. We’re apparently at ‘peak newsletter’ so you probably don’t need anything more to read, but in case you do, I also enjoy receiving updates in my inbox from Emi Kolawole, Austin Kleon, Adam Grant and Jean Hannah Edelstein.

Adding value to my life right now…

Reframing ‘I have to’ into ‘I get to’. A little tip I took away from James Clear’s interview on the 10% Happier podcast – next time you find yourself saying (or thinking) that you have to do something, try reframing it and tell yourself that you get to do it instead. ‘I have to pick up E from school’ -> ‘I get to pick up E from school’, ‘I have to deliver 3 workshops this week’ -> ‘I get to deliver 3 workshops this week’. It’s a great way to quickly shift yourself into a place of gratitude rather than obligation.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Head and Heart, Journal Tagged With: books, meditation, podcasts

Head & Heart – September 2015

October 2, 2015 By Clare Leave a Comment

Only 2 days after the end of the month (a record!), here’s my sixth Head & Heart post – “a monthly capture of my feelings and doings, in the raw.”

What I’ve been doing

Experiments in juicing!
Experiments in juicing!
  • After my blergh August, I’ve got on back track with a few things that make me healthier and happier – meditating (on my bus commute using the Calm app), tracking my spending using YNAB, walking more regularly (and I’ve started tracking my steps using the Fitbit app). I’ve also been blending fresh juices/smoothies and feel like they’re (positively) impacting on my energy levels.
  • September also involved quite a bit of work preparing for the new She Leads Diploma intake. I am really committed to continuing to improve the course to make it one of the most innovative leadership development programs for women in Canberra. Like conference organising, I feel that designing training is something that aligns with my strengths, providing an opportunity for creativity within a structured program.

I’m grateful for

  • Sunshine. I’ve been noticing and appreciating feeling the sun on my skin as I exercise.
  • FaceTime. We don’t have any family in Canberra so FaceTime is such an important way for E to get to know and maintain connection with her family.
  • My family’s good health. We were all well this month (apart from a touch of hayfever) and what a difference it made to how productive I felt and my mental wellbeing.

I’ve been thinking about

  • Tooting my friends’ horns. In Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg shares a story of a workplace/team where instead of asking the women to talk about themselves, she asked them to tell one another’s stories, which made the women more comfortable and also helps to avoid that perception that women who talk up their own accomplishments are less likeable. This month I was listening to an episode of Chat 10 Looks 3 where Leigh Sales mentioned that when Annabel Crabb’s book The Wife Drought came out she purchased 1000 copies and sent them (with a personalised note) to leaders all around the country. These two stories got me thinking about how valuable it is for women to call out and promote the great things that other women in our networks are doing and has motivated me to start doing this more regularly for my friends and colleagues.
  • How we talk about/the assumptions we make about the division of household/parenting responsibilities. An except from Anne-Marie Slaughter’s new book, Unfinished Business, was published on Time – ‘Women are Sexist Too’ – and it, along with Jess Irvine’s opinion piece on parenting and inequality, has got me thinking about the default language I use in discussions about division of household/parenting responsibilities. No longer will I talk about male partners ‘helping’ around the house or with kids, and I’ll fight any tendency I have to leave ‘instructions’ for Jason next time I’m away!

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Head and Heart, Journal Tagged With: books, gratitude, meditation, podcasts, reflection

Head & Heart – June 2015

July 5, 2015 By Clare Leave a Comment

Head & Heart is designed to be “a monthly capture of my feelings and doings, in the raw.” 

What I’ve been doing

  • I mentioned it briefly in last month’s post, but this month started with a trip to Adelaide to do a Executive Certificate in Event Management.
  • I’m also super excited to have commenced in a permanent part-time position at YWCA Canberra as the newly created Leadership Programs Manager. I’ll be managing and trying to grow the range of great women’s leadership development initiatives under the SheLeads brand.
  • A message from one of my aunties via Ancestry.com got me interested in delving into more details of my family tree. I tend to do my family tree research in bursts – mainly because I only want to pay for Ancestry.com premium access for a month at a time and try to get maximum value out of it! In this recent round of research I discovered a few new interesting facts… My 2nd great-grandfather, Robert McDonald, was the keeper of the Gladstone Gaol in South Australia for over 20 years in the early 1900s. My 3rd great-grandfather, John Tortoise, built and was the first publican of the Western Hotel in Port Augusta.
Sunny Canberra winter days
Sunny Canberra winter days

I’m grateful for

  • Sunny Canberra winter days. Even when it’s freezing outside, being able to see the sun is such a delight.
  • My brother Neale coming to stay at short notice to help me out with caring for E while J was away for a couple of weeks.

I’ve been thinking about

  • Meditation, and why I don’t do it! Reading 10% Happier (see below) really highlighted so many of the benefits of meditation (many of which I was aware of) and I can see how a regular meditation practice would be a valuable thing to do. But for whatever reason, I’ve never been able to get into the habit of meditating regularly – perhaps it’s the difficultly in finding a time/space where I know I won’t be interrupted for 5 minutes, or the belief that I need to finish all of the other things on my to-do list first before I can sit down and take a few minutes for myself.
  •  June marked one full year of using You Need a Budget (YNAB) – the longest period that I’ve ever stuck with any kind of expenditure tracking/budget program – so I’ve been thinking about the impact that it has had. I won’t delve too deeply into money stuff (and all my associated money hang-ups) here, but while I can’t credit YNAB with magically transforming our spending habits or financial position, it’s helped me to get my ‘head out of the sand’ and as a result feel more in control and less anxious about where our money is going and ensuring that all our major commitments will be met.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Head and Heart, Journal Tagged With: books, Canberra, family tree, meditation, money, parenting, podcasts, reading, YNAB, ywca

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