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The measure of a day

June 16, 2017 By Clare 2 Comments

With a new baby to care for, at the end of the day I often find myself glancing around the chaos in my home, running through the never-ending mental ‘to-do’ list, and lamenting that ‘I got nothing done today’.

It’s so easy to get pulled into the trap of believing we need to do more in order to have more and to be more. My perceptions of success and self-worth are tied to my productivity. But what if I asked questions to determine the value of my day that were better than ‘what did I get done?’? Questions that were more aligned with my values and what really matters to me right now.

How deeply did I love and allow myself to be loved today?

Did I express love and appreciation for people I care about?

Who did I connect with? Did I form new connections or strengthen old ones?

What opportunities will I have to do this better tomorrow?

Filed Under: Journal Tagged With: love, productivity, questions, relationships

50 Days with a Newborn: Reflections on Life, Love and Parenting

August 23, 2013 By Clare 1 Comment

50 days ago I added ‘mother’ and ‘parent’ to my list of titles (well, actually 52 days ago – it’s taken me a few days to finish this post!). Without a doubt, these last 50 days have been the hardest of my life. I had no idea just how physically, mentally and emotionally demanding this parenting gig would be. My friend Gavin described it like a baby bootcamp. He’s right. You get pushed to your limit, you’re completely exhausted, and then you’re screamed at (often literally) to give just a little bit more.

But as the ‘new parent fog’ begins to lift I’m beginning to appreciate the lessons I’ve learned and new insights I’ve gained. As well as the million and one practical parenting lessons, here are 10 larger life lessons that the last 50 days has revealed or reminded me of…

  1. There are no do-overs. Miss some tired signs and keep her up too long, think she’s tired when really she’s crying ’cause she’s starving, don’t burp her for long enough and she ends up covered in vomit… You never get to go back in time and make a different decision. You have to live with the outcome of the little decisions you make and all you can do is try to learn when things don’t go quite right. But at the same time, the ‘no do-overs’ also applies to the good stuff. I’ll never get a second chance to experience her ‘firsts’ so even when I’m wanting to fast-forward through the tough bits, I need to be present and to enjoy these moments as much as I can. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Journal Tagged With: ella, family, love, parenting

Things I’ve been thinking about (19/1)

January 19, 2011 By Clare 1 Comment

The slightly random things that I’ve noticed/have been pondering today…

The science of love, and the future of women – Helen Fisher

“Love” is fascinating… And this is such an interesting talk which makes me think lots about the relationships between neuroscience, emotions and behaviour.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-ewvCNguug[/youtube]

Sorry

What does ‘sorry’ mean? How do different people use the expression ‘sorry’ differently? Can this lead to frustration/confusion? Can you use ‘sorry’ too much? Does it lose its meaning to the person saying it, and the person hearing it when it’s used frequently? Can it be used as an expression of sympathy, without apology for wrong doing or a mistake?

Definitions and uses for the word ‘sorry’ from the Macmillan Dictionary

The Holstee Manifesto

Love it!

Company manifesto from Holstee (kickass products, sustainably made, with a social impact).

via David Hood

Dahl

Jason and I made dahl for the the first time (recipe from Maeve O’Meara’s Food Safari). But we used canned lentils (from the back of the pantry and therefore of indeterminate age) and olive oil instead of ghee… And the result was okay, but not great… Next time I’m going to try Emily’s recipe – which I only remembered was included as an appendix to the 2010 Backhouse Lecture [pdf] after we’d starting making our batch.

Filed Under: Journal Tagged With: brain, dahl, love, sorry, TED, things

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