Life with a newborn feels frantic and slow.
I’m challenged everyday, and I’m bored.
I’m never alone, and I’m lonely.
I feel a super human physical strength, and I’m bone-shatteringly exhausted.
I’m full of self doubt, and I trust that I’m good enough.
I am drawn to him, and I desperately want some space.
I want to fast forward through these bits to a time when he’s older (easier?), and I weep when I think that he’ll never be 5 weeks old again.
Archives for June 2017
Good Enough?
Sometimes I wish that
I was a better mother
Am I good enough?
Good Advice
For the first 12 weeks
Just keep your baby alive
And try to stay sane
Vomit
Cleaning up vomit
Makes me feel like a real mum
All part of the job
The measure of a day
With a new baby to care for, at the end of the day I often find myself glancing around the chaos in my home, running through the never-ending mental ‘to-do’ list, and lamenting that ‘I got nothing done today’.
It’s so easy to get pulled into the trap of believing we need to do more in order to have more and to be more. My perceptions of success and self-worth are tied to my productivity. But what if I asked questions to determine the value of my day that were better than ‘what did I get done?’? Questions that were more aligned with my values and what really matters to me right now.
How deeply did I love and allow myself to be loved today?
Did I express love and appreciation for people I care about?
Who did I connect with? Did I form new connections or strengthen old ones?
What opportunities will I have to do this better tomorrow?
Second baby
Things I’d forgotten
Vomit, poo, sleep and self doubt
I remember now
Survival
For the first six weeks
The goal is just survival
For our family